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Living In My World Of
Nightmare
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MeMyself&I
NuRuL SyAzWaNi8TeeN Republic Poly DIDM Likes The UnUsuaL ♥Attached To >> Hairi Azman 101010♥™ Lullaby
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Thursday, 24 April 2008
today exam...dunno can make it or nort..i hope so...tmr mt paper..tuday no topic tu tok abt..only aft paper go sent him as usual..den wait fer daus den go safra study...den go ntuc mom ask me tu buy chicken wings(frozen)..k nthng tu tok abt.. gtg..bye!! Wednesday, 23 April 2008
As usual,go sch wit hym..but tuday im abit late...reached sch at around 7.15am..I'm sori syg...fer cuming late.In sch, haha..quite intresting aft recess.FAYYAD carrry the BIG YELLOW DUSTBIN frm the outside n brought in the claz..and put it by the door and c the reaction of my clazmatez wen they walk in the claz..haha i tot of taking video..but lazy..n we were laughing..n in tv the show "JUZ FER LAUGH GAGS"..but boring during eng as FIRDAUS iz nort in sch tu day..tu crack some jokes in eng lesson...quite silent witout hym..mathz 2 periodz..but im quite semangat during mathz i dunno y so sudden?!!Den aft maths lesson i cleaned up the clazroom fer tmr.EXAM!!! BUT IM NORT PREPARED N HAF NORT STARTED STUDYING!!!! He sent me home until maii bus stop..ouh yea ive fergotten tu say thank u tu hym..wic i wanted tu..but i ferget..STM!!wat tu duh!!!?? and NOW i haf tu PROMISE maiself tu start studying!!I haf Tu!!! Tuesday, 22 April 2008
21 April 2008. as usual,went to sch with my syg..but only difference is tat wen i reached where we were suppose to meet every morning....he left a lil note...saying,"reached.but went to toilet =).ridzwan". ouh sooooooooo cute!!! hahaz.. so nort long after he appeared and off we go. PE quite bored as there is nothing to play...and we were sick& tired of playing the idiotic FLOORBALL.so juz slack around with atin,atikah,weishen,gernette..chatting..weishen made a funny face.tok about dimplez..n much more..LOL!! i didnt xpect weishan was lyke tat..there is still a lil boy in him..his HORNY also..hahaz!! puar lessons im abit EMO..dunno wat happen tuh me..so sudden!!she scolded me for daydreaming..which im not!! i was waiting for her next instructions sial.SORT SIA TU JALANG!!=)WTF!! but luckily i didnt argue with her..i juz ignored her and juz switch my ears off n stared blankly.. i became frustrated with ppl around me..firstly they juz pretend im not around..as if im invinsible..the world dosent seem to care..forgetting me..which i called them ppl hu dosent appreciate ppl's trust,sincerity and respect.bz about others..but im still thinking where i've gone wrong...feeling so left-out..but even if i say..they will say "who cares?!!" so now i dont bother bout them and cares bout them.let me do wat i want to do..in my own world..and there's other ppl still cares bout me..laz words for this kind of ppl.. "GET OUT OF MY WAY!!!DONT EVEN BOTHER BOUT ME SINCE U DONT BOTHER BOUT URSELVES!!" secondly bout my family..give me pressure..of giving me a JUNK of HOUSEWORKS!!! how m i going to study since u gave me loads of houseworks to be done..while my bro can shake legs du nuthing..especially my bro,syareez no homework PLAY GUITAR 24/7.whereelse i hv tonz n tonz of hmwrk!!!! and how im going to study if the house is juz lyke in the PUB?!!! so noisy!! wen i want to go out..u nvr let me..fed up lurh!!! I CANT STAND IT!!! i feel lyke running away from home and live ALONE!! i will nvr nake ppl'z life difficult so do i!! i prefer to be dead than being treated this way!! so now...i dont care bout anything already!! i dont care bout studies!! if i fail my MYE..i gonna let all my frustrations out and u will get hurt by my WORDS!!!SO BEWARE!! i gonna revenge u ppl!!!!! lastly..bout the 'PURE WHITE LACE' i gonna c ya suffer!!HAHAHAH!!GTH!! my tears suddenly ran down my cheeks but no one saw it..only ppl notice that im a lil quiet and in a mood swing..and ask if im okay..i juz noded..after sch still moody..my syg asked me if im ok..ijuz say yea..but he knew tat im not obviously..my syg comforted me and told me not to be sad..if i sad he too will be sad..so i juz nodded and smiled showing tat im okay..and i waved gdbye and off i went fer my oral exam-okay lurh..only pic conversation i cant so it..and im the 2nd laz..so i finish at around 4:35PM..he waited 4 me than 5pm we went home.i 'sent' him home and off i go take 812 cuz lazy to walk to interchange. at home after bathing.i open the bathroom door harshly..here comes my clumsyness..n the door hit my face n i stood there blurly..haha..den at 8++pm i went out to buy drawing block..and reached home about 9pm.den i started my art..den my f*****g dad call me out & told me to switch off my mp4 which was plugged into a speaker with a high volume..and told me to study..i cant listen to music and it will never benefits me! i was there feeling frustrated again! juz dont bother and continued on my art..but i was doing art.wats wrong? cant i listen u f*****g idiot?!! juz shut ur hell up bitch!! so today plz learn ur lesson ppl..I AM ALSO A HUMAN BEING.HAVE FEELINGS JUZ LYKE U PPL.AND SHUT UR HELL OFF! NVR TO BOTHER ABT MY LIFE..IT IS NONE OF UR BUSINESS TO CARE BOUT ME!!! IM USED TO IT! IM A LONER AT HOME AND MY ONLY FRENS R JUZ MY RADIO AND MY MP4.THEY UNDERSTANDS ME BETTER! AND NOES WAT I AM FEELING! SO GET OUT OF MY LIFE! JUZ GET UR ASS OFF MY LIFE! I DONT NEED U PPL! REALLY? AND IM NOT UR SLAVE! Saturday, 19 April 2008
i cant wait tu see..ur reaction aft u gort tu noe...Juz wait and see..........i HATE u!!! Always forgive,Never forget.Its just like me to pretend.And give into her every need.Showing no signs of defeat.Thirsting for you,Thirsting for the tears you cry.Waiting for you,Waiting for your pleading criesDon't be blinded by her.Don't be blinded; its disguise.Don't be blinded by her eyes.Skin so soft and pure white lace.Beauty takes control of you.Don't be blinded by her eyes.Don't be blinded its disguise.She'll suck every inch of life from deep inside of you.Her burning passion for hate takes control of you.Every inch of light from deep inside.My only regret lies in all the nights.Spine removed from back,Faced down on the floor.If he offered her his heart,But still she wanted more.Skin so soft.Beauty is only skin deep.Pure white lace;Is enough to cut through,Exposing what's beneath!!! No one ever said that life was fair and I'm not saying that it should be.So knowing that you are what you want to be and I'm not comes as no surprise.But don't expect me to be happy for you.And don't smile at me and tell me things will work out for me tooI don't want your pity... I hate your pity.Taste your vanity and it's sweet bitterness. As you hide behind your veil of my stolen hopes and lost dreams... You took them all... I watched you steal my thoughts and had to see you smile.As you build your dreams on my shattered hopes,I'll look back on a day once loved and fantasize for tragedy.Beg me to make this easier and listen to my hopeless cries.Suffer alone in emptiness.I lust to see you swallowed by the mess that you left in your wake.Disgust lies deep within your empty gaze... Beg me to make this easier and listen as my hopeless cries.Send stares into your meaningless eyes.My envy can't describe how I loathe you for having all the stars.Leaving my eyes to marvel the sky knowing it should be mine.Yet it's you I see wasting the dream that only I deserveI'll tear off your face to see your smile.As you build your dreams on my shattered hopes,I'll look back on a day once loved and fantasize for tragedyBeg me to make this easier and listen as my hopeless cries.Send stares into your meaningless eyes!!! And STOP BOTHERING ME!!!!!!CONGRATZ!!!I HATE U!!! Sunday, 13 April 2008
12 April 08 went out with atin, irfan, zalikha, pearl, daus, wan to watch the bands from different schools. OPSS won silver!! congrats!! after that went to eat at bugis than walked around at bugis street. tempting oi! after that, MRT-ed to khatib. zalikha & irfan dropped at yishun. than a history is made on 12 april 2008 in front of 7-eleven at 8:33PM. im no longer single :D send him home.  after sending him home. met up with pearl & atin at khatib mac. after eating again, hahaha walk to pearl's blk. lepak lepak a while than pearl went home first. atin & me was looking some nice lighting to snap pics. haha. than patah balek mac. snap gambar lagik. tak abes2 aku ngan atin. hahahahaah!! around 11:15PM we went home. iWANi <3 Thursday, 3 April 2008
haiiz......tuday im suppose tu meet atin around 7:45am in skul tu do homework...but came late coz the nus was late...sial palabutz...reached skul around 8 den du homework..MT tuday like muziq claz..singing barney, malaysia national song, krayon, cinta arjun(remix! malay cum chinese cum indian) beautiful girl(remix!) n much2 more...tok2 never du the work given..fun sial! hist claz wan!...so bored..until lentok2! sleepy sia...abt hitler! recess..soalan cepumas dari irfan..but not so larh actually..i tot he want tu noe or wad larh..but it sounds weird leh..suddenly he ask during physics..den i say "wats wrong! why suddenly u ask me that?" at laz he told me..i was so NOT shock wen i heard it.. coz my firasat said so..haha..wah...no comment..actually only skejap i like him but now juz frens..but if u ask me i will say..i dunno.................................coz i also still heart D. k watever larh..maths & english veri mendak giler babz..after skul i nid to go & take pants for syaza den cum bec to skul again..after that i go bec home alone take 812 n meet atin at around 3 tu lepak wic we actually intend to do homwork & watchout for D. at last go 300+ lepak.. den got diz two boys from NVPS..lyke mentally retarded..i think dey forget to eat obat..than it started to rain heavily..how tu go back!!!!!!walau wey...nvr bring cardigan..veri cold..than suddenly my paper fly..basah! koyak! babilu! den i felt mendak i miss kol ppl & one of them is D. den he kol bec i din answer...den he kol bec i kol him but at last i pick up D's kol..& step dunno & ask hu iz tat!HAHA.bdh siak! SO LAME! ouhkay larh..i noe mai blog abit boring & merepek!! i saw mai pri skul fren,richard... hmm..i tink he really ignores me..k i dun wanna hope t0o much on hym..k larh...since u hv fergotten me..nvm..i'll try tu ferget u...i still feel dat he really --- tu me since tat day..k life muz go on..n it will b the sweetest memory of me & D..k i try mai bez tu 4get u..although it hurts wen u did diz tu me..thankx for wat u've done.. Wednesday, 2 April 2008
Haiiz....tuday in sch nthng interesting....biase2 only.....pendek kn crite....nthng interesting....sori slh mkn obat arh.................only assbly tyme gerek..aft sch go home wit atin......den eat at mac..haf tu spend mai saving wic i nid to save for my fren's prezen.........mit ayun to transfer songs to her 1gb memory card...sit sit sit i do my humwerk..finish physics only....than i tok tok tok than saw one grp of NSS stewdents....i kinda stare at them & i saw him....i was really shock & felt lyk running after him....50 50 but alas din go....but than we walked towards the yishun library & saw one grp of NSS stewdents..tot it was the grp juz now...went closer to have a look...but skali nmpk grp ciner larh....kelekek! paiseyh...HAHAHA.kay uh nutink to tok about actuallie tuday.. I MISS HYM SoOoOOoOO MUCH!!!!! |
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I Love You
♥Hairi Azman♥ |
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