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Living In My World Of
Nightmare
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MeMyself&I
NuRuL SyAzWaNi8TeeN Republic Poly DIDM Likes The UnUsuaL ♥Attached To >> Hairi Azman 101010♥™ Lullaby
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Friday, 19 December 2008
i jst came back frm my fri routine. i met zal b4 i met him. thx zal fer the aju. i guess i noe y u don like it. lol. den i met him. we went to BK to eat. i ate HERSEY SUNDAE PIE? i guess i ferget the name lol. he ate nthng. den we walk to np and wait fer him bro at the basement. den they bought food. yea den we went straight home. as usual i sent him home. yea.. i guess im getting sick right now. sore throat.flu? i dunno. last night i slpt at 3am. ystrday i went AMK to watch TWILGHT. with Atin & Zal. yea.very packed wit ppl. the movie is okay..bt i prefer the book. i want to cllct all the series & all vampy types of book. i love it so much!! yeah!!! wen i get the money i will borong!! lol!! wait fer nxt year fer pocket money. cant wait. but i actually aimming fer a bag.DICKIES! nw is on offer. haiz..but i hv no $$. yea.. haiz... nvrmd..save it!! YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY Labels: randomness-dunnoe wat to say. Tuesday, 16 December 2008
UPDATED! TO-DO LIST for this wk: -scrap the wallpaper in my bedroom. -paint it(but not today) -*Twilight* -clean up my room(tmr) Labels: prepared- one word: CONFUSED!! Labels: wat are u trying to show? Sunday, 14 December 2008
ego & selfishness nvr worked in relationships. but watever happens it's just btwn me n u. and tht's wat i've learned through a friendship. on the other hand,it will destroy. im a person doesnt really share my secret, i like to keep to myself. i dunn noe how to show/share my feelings. im a type tht seldom get upset & cry. bcoz i'll nvr leave my heart open;like the rihanna song;Cry lol. to me:i dont care abt the person as long they were hapy wat they are doing and doesnt disturb me.and i already hapi fer them. im a girl tht really don like to argue,quarrel and creating chaos over a small thing and let them do as long they are hapy. i just feel sad to see ppl fighting,beating each other. i dun mind if im hurt. coz i healed up very quickly. i get over it very quickly. im a short tempered and cool down fast.it cn be juz in seconds. but scars will be remain in my heart. the pain may heal but the scars will be permenent. the other important thing is TRUST. im also a type of person tht forgetting things fast. STM (short-term memory) i shud say. u shud say wat ive done wrong tht makes u unhapy wit cz i cant rmbr. but sometimes it is very disappointing tht someone didnt see effort tht u're putting in. they will nvr understnd and obviously doesnt appreciate it. they nvr see wat im i doing. ive been going through difficult times. u didnt see tht. i tried to win ur heart, u still didnt see tht. ppl will easily spot my mistakes but nvr see the effort tht im putting in.. they dont noe the difficult times tht im going through. coz i dun show them coz i dunnow how. try to put urself in my shoe. i always did dat b4 i jumped into action and conclusion. i like to find out first b4 jumping into cnclusion. and makes me demoralised in the end. nobdy noes wat i feel,wat i did,wat im going through xcept GOD. wat i can say is just tht u're still emotionaly not stable yet. and hope u noe wat ya doing. hope u're hapy of wat u're doing. let me just suffer. i dont mind. and tiz holiday i spent most of the time with my beloved family. juz to let u noe tht. this song is for u.. My Only by Goodnight nurse. What happened to u and me? ahhaa ahhaa One moment chnged everythng ahhaa ahhaa It's done and there's no way to take i back Mistake gave me the pain I never had There is no way to justify it's so Now I breathe in and let it go This is the end of everythng GDbye my only I hang my head and I give in Gdbye my only Friend Part of me I'll nvr see Ahhaa Ahhaa Come visit me in my dreams Ahhaa Ahhaa I feel my actions are destroying me Deep down the shallow life I lead This pain is mine to keep and cll my own I'll carry it until i'm gone This us the end of everything Gdbye my only I hang my head and i gv in Gdbye my only Friend I cant forgive myself tht i let go My life is worth no more than yours i know This is the end of everythng Gdbye my only I hang my head and i give in Gdbye my only This is the end of evrythng Gdbye my only I hang my head and i give in Gdbye my only FRIEND! Labels: it's juz a small thing-out to my own world-let god noes wat im doing Friday, 12 December 2008
i loved today! Kiki msged me. Wan chnged the venue. i went out lil early to meet him. so i went to lib to borrow books. i borrowed: BEASTLY; usually abt the darkside tht i love. & LAST KISS. den he waited for me. im lil late;perhaps. the we walk to 200plus den buy bbletea. then sat at the void deck. we chat2. den he told me wat he wanted to tell me during Prom Night tht i hv waited for. we had a deal. i guess it's not appropriate to let it out here. i will keep it in my heart. it's just so SWEET tht i'm just speechless. at abt 2pm we walk home. as usual i sent him home. we walked frm 200plus until 600plus. den i wished him. i went home. ------------------------------- last night my family and i went to AMK. i bought a PUMA t-shirt! i love it! lol! den my dad say tht i can work. wth! nvr tell earlier!! sch gonna open soon. i not i cn work already! but i say nxt yr! -- JUST RANDOM! Labels: Deal? You're my FIRST LOVE Thursday, 11 December 2008
  Hayley Williams! i want tiz hair style! im gonna cut and dyed like tiz. im gonna cut my hair like tiz maybe at the end of this mth. and dyed RED like tht aft my O. but not the whole hair..highlight! Tmr it's gonna be a great day! .121208. yay! as usual fri routine. im goin lib to return bk. meet him at OCBC tmr. if im nt wrong. @ 12.20pm. Labels: im just tired Tuesday, 9 December 2008
 me!! it was given to every volunteers!6 December 08 Night:my family and i went to Marina Barrage with my aunties and uncles and also my cute lil cuzzins. It was quite windy there. i love tht place as it has a beautiful view of the city and give me some peace. we played with the fountains there. Aft tht we went to the Railway Station to eat. at abt 3am we reached home. 7 December 08 my family and i and also my cuzzy frm Johor, went to Bussorah St to have our lunch there. me and my mum ordered Fish & Chips while the boys ordered Chicken Cutlet. The meal is quite big. we ended up not finishing the meal. we packed it home. aft thth we walk2 the area. then we saw Mediacorp artistes like Shahrin,Rafaat Hamzah & many more. they were shooting. at first my dad say we are going to East Coast but we ended up eating at Bussorah St. Later at night we celebrated my bro,Syareez,birthday. 8 December 08 Mum woke me up at 6 plus dor Subuh but i didnt wake up as i was so sleepy. then at abt 7.05am i woke up. im supposed to to be at the mosque at 7.30am. then i get myself ready. my cuzzy,Liyana came and waited for me to get ready. we didnt go to the mosque straight as we noe tht i was packed with the jemaah. so we waited at the void deck near my house. then at abt 8am we walk slowly to the mosque. then we waited outside the mosque as we cant go in yet. while we waited,the strong smell of the sheeps make me wanna vomit. i didnt hv breakfast tht morning. it even make me more neusea. then we went up by the side of the mosque. it starts to drizzle. the rain pour quite heavy. all the jemaah who were at the carpark went under the void deck for shelter. we must ring the mat under the void deck to let tthe ppl sit. we were damn wet tht morning. then we waited until 8.30 for briefing and attandence taking at the container. den we make fwens with the other volunteers. like Taufiq, Syafiqah,Shahiran,Shahirah,Amalina & much more. we were divided into 3 grps of 5s. It was my BIG day at the Darul Makmur Mosque. I volunteered myself for the korban. this is my first time doing a volunteer job at the mosque as the CLO (Customer L______(i forget the word.hahas) Officer). WE are the frontline of the event. the role of this job is: we must guide the participant throughout his/her korban. our task is to bring our participant to the waiting room to wait for their turn. we needed to ask them to bring their shoes along as they gonna witness the korban at the slaughtering area where it is gonna be very bloody there. then aft tht i must sign in my name and waited for the signal wheather it's thier turn to witness the korban. as the CLO, we are given ziplock bag(s) depending how much they wanna korban. then went i get the signal,i need to bring the participant to witness the korban at the slaughtering site. wen i reach there, i need to give a tag,card and the cable tie to the slaughterer. then aft tht i must bring him/her back to the waiting rm 2 to do survey while waiting for the meat to be collected. they were give a survienior. they can help themselves with drinks and food provided. wen i get the signal,i called the participant to collect their meat. i must give another card to the collection counter. aft they collected thier meat then our job is done. but we must do it continuously until the end of whole event. my first participant was a pakcik. he's very cute.haha. he korban 3 sheeps. luckily im not tht blurr. i thought tiz task is difficult but it's not. then my second participant was also a pakcik. but i ended up giving the task to Liyana for the in-charge officer as there is not enough CLOs to take other participants. my third participant was a makcik. she is very kind. she korban 1 sheep for her husband. then i have to give my last task to the chief of the CLO,kak Suryati. as i nid to pick up another participants. so i went up. i waited. no participant. finally finished! so i went down again. i still saw my last participant,the makcik. she still haven't collected her meat. pity her! she waited for a long time. then at last her name was called. then she thanked me. haha.both of the participants tht i guided ask me to fill in their survey form for them. makcik didnt bring her specs while the pakcik dunno wat to write. lol! aft it was done,we nid to go back to the container for debrief & eat. me and my cuzzy didnt go for he debrief as our parents were waiting for us. so we went home first. i went home to bathe. if not i smell like the sheep! lol! then get ready for my father to fetch me frm home. den go my grandma's(my mum side) place. aft tht we went to my another grandma's place at AMK. wen ireached there the first thing to do is to SLEEP!! haha.i had a long long nap. Tired sia! but i hv fun doing the volunteering job. love it! maybe nxt year, perhaps. even Taufiq,one of the volunteer ask me to participate more in Youth Activities in DM. insyallah! Luckily i didnt get fussy participants! alhamdulillah! i felt so tenang wen i did tiz job! alhamdulillah! amin! Labels: SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDIL ADHA Saturday, 6 December 2008
UPDATED! my religious tcher called me. ask me to volenteer on Hari Raya Haji. so i agreed. ya skali skala dpt pahala!! lols! but now i get upset. but why? bcoz of tht post maybe. i juz nid a listening hear. maybe. i just dunno. r u dumping me? k fine! as long as u're happy! i've not been hapy for long tyme actually. i just dunnoe. i dun like argueing. kay ya wateva. and i hate it so much! Labels: upset me last night, my family & i wen to the dental clinic. den we went to sheng siong. den we went for mkn at teh tarik. i was so pissed of wen my food didnt came. smpai ilang mood nk mkn. drpd lapar smpai dh tk lapar. haiz..aper larh naseb. later tht night was so heaven! my bro teach me to play I DONT LOVE YOU by MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE. den we chat. until 4 plus in the morning den we sleep. it's been a long time tht i nvr chat with him. i miss those times. all the memories were so sweet wen i rmbr it. tmr his 15th bdae. im gonna make him a memoriable bdae fer him. haha. love him so much! -------------------- xoxoxo tc! bye! Labels: syareez xoxoxo Friday, 5 December 2008
i just reached home. frm my fri routine & buy present fer my bro. i really miss him alot!! i went out at 1.28pm to meet him aft prayers. wen i was otw i bumped on atin & ared. haha. den i waited fer him fer abt 10 min. he came with if. den walk to np. den if went off. we walk walk at np. i miss those times. then i walked him home. i really miss him. we didnt spent much tyme together. den i took 812 to np to buy my bro present. wen i was waiting, i bumped to my bro's fwen.. Daniel. he is the drummer of the Rubber Band(my bro's band). then we tok2. haha. i was like so shy2 wen i tok to him. he ask me how's my bro my band? (i was like..huh?band?since wen i hv a band?) am i playing bass? juz say.. arh...ya..dunno? haha he say he long time nvr go jamming wit RB. den i cntinued on my storybook. den i bought my bro's present. i bought him a flip flop. ya.. hope he likes it! haha i really miss the previous times. i noe tht it not gonna happen again. only miracle tht can happen btwn us. i really miss those days with my fwens and also my SYG. zal:thx fer being my listening ear! im so grateful to hv a fwen lyke u. u're one of my fwen tht undstnds me. thnk u so much! i appreciate it!! ya.. miss you guys! ily! tc! --------------- Labels: missing you Thursday, 4 December 2008
omg! so geramm!! i try to edit my pic frm 12pm until nw hv nort finish yet!! coz com lack!! im so pissed out!! haiz... tmr fri routine. im gonna buy my bro present. his bdae coming tiz sun. 7 dec. i dunnnoe wat to buy fer him. gimme some idea! last nite i went to mai aunt's house at seng kang. mai fav i shud say. i love Zafran. he's so cute!! i miss him so much! he has grown up.. OBVIOUSLY!! LIKE DUHH!! lol. yea.. wat the hell! nthng to tok abt today. yeah.. tc! Labels: pissed off Wednesday, 3 December 2008
UPDATED!!! omg im getting bored right nw! but smhow im feeling so excited!! dunnoe why? haha. lols. atin suggest: entertain myself. tok to myself. but i said to her.. tht's wat's my daily routine. haha. lols. omg!!! im bored!! nthng to do.. actually have.. hmwk. k. .......................... ............. . .......... ..... ...... speechless! ........................................ '______________________________' $#@!%&(*$%$@@!~@ Labels: damn bored zal came to my house fer awhile. im getting bored. art. i'm stuck! dunno where to begin. i think im gonna chnge my topic. camouflage no more. but i dunno. im gonna find one. sch gonna be open in a few wks time. time flies very fast. so fast tht im missing a lot of things. and i need to catch up. im gonna be 17 nxt mth on the 29. so fast. another the more yrs im gonna be 20. time really flies. i hv nort plan fer my future yet. not really i shud say. im gonna sit fer my O nxt year. i need to settledown hopefully. i need to focus more in class. i shud try. coz i noe im easily distructed. so i shud try. hopefully no more distructions. but i hv a dream. hopefully i cant reach tht dream. but tht dream is not really necessary in life. but im really interested to hv a band. i dunno. i jus dream. and i do not mean it will come true. but i hv a REAL dream. im gonna be a DESIGNER! bt im nort sure wat im i gonna design. bcoz im hv alot of interest in other type of designing. but currently im designing tshirts. but nt really completed it. im reaaallly into it!! and music is my passion. i love musics. esp ROCK! but im really interested in visual comm. im gonna look into it! yeah!! Labels: dreams Tuesday, 2 December 2008
ive received a shocking news this morning. syaza's mum passed away. at first i receive a sms frm syaza but i didnt read it coz im still slping. den i received a phone cll frm atikah at abt 10.30am it really shocked me. feel sad for her.. den i go bathe. i cried. den at abt 12noon i met zal and off we went to syaza's house for melawat wen we was otw.. we saw fayyad. he ride the same bus. den we met ain atika & if under void deck. aft meeting them we met wawan. then we went up. wen i sat wit syaza, i felt so sayu.. she sat by her mum's body. i felt like crying but i controlled myself. den aft dat we sat outside. until the mum's body was brought down to bring to the graveyard. soon aft dat we went off. aft dat if blanja us drinks. den zal & i went to atika's house. den we went to my grandma's house. we eat pizza & much much more. then went went home at abt 5.10pm. wen we aboard the 811 bus we saw someone familiar. we saw atin. den she alighted at the nxt to khtb mrt bus stp. aft dat we alighted at intchnge. we took 800 home. i reached home at abt 5.50pm. slm takziah. be strong beb! ily! ---------------------------------------------- omg! it's really him on fri night! wat a coincidence! tc! bbbye! |
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I Love You
♥Hairi Azman♥ |
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